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How to talk to adult children about gray divorce

by | Feb 19, 2019 | Firm News |

There has been a substantial increase in the number of couples over the age of 50 who divorce. Many baby boomers realize they still have 30 or 40 years left to live, and they do not want to spend that time with their spouses any longer. Additionally, they feel like divorce will be easier because all of their kids are out of the house. 

However, it is vital to realize divorce will always affect your children no matter how old they are. Before pursuing a divorce any further, both parents need to talk to their adult children to keep them in the loop. There are some things parents should expect with this conversation. 

Do not speak negatively about the other parent

Your kids have grown up respective both of their parents. You do not want to speak ill of anyone during this time. There are numerous reasons why you may have decided to divorce. However, you may want to keep certain details private if you think it would do more harm than good to tell your kids about it. It is vital for kids to have good relationships with both of their parents. 

Do not make your kids your only support system

You will go through a lot of emotions during this time, too. You may feel like your adult children can be your friends, and you can lean on them. However, you are always a parent first and foremost. Your kids may have to sort through all of their emotions and require some space. 

Do remain patient and prepared

Your kids may respond to the divorce in any number of ways. They may feel angry and lash out. They could suddenly become depressed. It takes time for children to come to terms with the divorce, and you need to give them as much time as they need. You need to do whatever you can to help your kids adjust.